The apostle Paul utters a mystery regarding marriage, and that is that human marriage refers to Christ and the church. The husband represents Christ, and he carries the duty of dying daily for his bride that he might present her without spot or wrinkle. The wife represents the church. Her duty is to respect her husband, submitting to him and honoring him as the church does Christ. This is mystery enough. But there is a preamble to this mystery, which the same apostle delivers in another of his letters, and that preamble is nearly as mysterious as the wedding itself. That preamble involves Jesus humbling Himself by taking on the form of man.
Philippians 2:5-9 says, “Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus: Who, being in the form of God, thought it not robbery to be equal with God: But made Himself of no reputation, and took upon Him the form of a servant, and was made in the likeness of men: And being found in fashion as a man, He humbled Himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross. Wherefore God also hath highly exalted Him.”
At the heart of marriage there is this great condescension and ascension, this going down to earth and raising up to heaven. It is no surprise that, in a backsliding nation where marriages fall apart, these same husbands and wives find their worlds falling apart. After long attempts at imagining there is no heaven above us and no hell below us, we have entered into the fever dream and found there is no husband and no wife, no man and no woman, no craggy mountains where we might meet with God, and no salt sea where we might meet His works.
And yet, man’s rebellion does not alter the simple fact that Jesus did descend. He made Himself of no reputation and became the servant of a lost mankind. God has highly exalted Him for running that particular rescue mission. Having earth in His arms, like the rest of us, and His feet now standing on the clouds of heaven, this Christ holds all things together, things below and things above.
Each man has his leanings. One man looks to get his head into the clouds. He tends to theory, abstraction, and theological deduction. He is intrigued by the skeleton as he is the framing of a house and the branches of a tree. But he may sometimes forget that there are leaves, flesh, and pillows on the couch. The other man does not need his head in the clouds but his hands in the dirt. It is all poems and imagination for him. He would work the field, not the skies. He wants to start at the material end of things and work inductively toward the final project.
Each man has his leanings, and the Lord seems perfectly fine with man’s proclivities. For He holds all things together, earth and sky, holy altars and common hearths, reason and passion, doctrine and art. He holds all things together, including marriage, wherein He binds man and woman together.
Jonathan, my charge to you is that you take the same form Christ did as you love your wife. He had to become a man before He could die. He is not only the Great God. He is the Great Man. He is not only the Word, but the Word made flesh. So ensure that your wife has a husband who has meat on the bone. Love her with your mind and your hands, your work and sweat. And if you find a puzzle in life and marriage that just doesn’t make sense, remember that is a feature, not a bug.
Gracia, my charge to you is that you welcome the structure supplied by Jonathan. You are not only flesh of his flesh, but you are bone of his bone. You will find order and direction in marriage as you will find it throughout the world God made. And, speaking of that world, your world is now growing much larger. And that world comes with wifely duties. When those duties stack up, remember that the Christ who holds heaven and earth together also holds you together, your marriage together, and all the varied jobs of a wife together.
In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, amen.
